-
I have blogged about this. A lot.
Its so depressing. It almost feel like i have no reason to live anymore.
Appearance does matter. Ppl judge you on first impression, and when they see smtg worth pointing out, they'll do it. Badmouth about how messy your hair is, badmouth how not sexily slim you are.
Badmouth about your legs.
I suppose, that a girl's main asset, is not her boobs. But one of them, are her legs.
And if you look at me, i dont have any assets worthy enough to flaunt about cos i do not have pretty legs. Scars live on them, and they constantly build up making it look worse than how it already is.
I put lotion on them, i wear socks to sleep but its getting worse and worse.
And scars are almost permanent. And they're not like permanent markers.
Permanent markers, when gone over by a regular whiteboard marker, is removable.
But i cant remove my scars. I feel like its doubling up each week and when i see a slight improvement, there's another area repeating the whole cycle again.
Ive cried about this so many times and i dont know what im able to do.
I cant wear denim shorts anymore or wear dresses comfortably cause my legs get in the way as disturbance to the naked eye. Im only comfortable when i cover my legs with stockings or jeans. But that means, limiting the number of clothes i can wear. And thats not comforting.
I worry everytime, in my school uniform.
I worry in the bus, on my way to school sitting on the seats what ppl sitting on the opposite side think of my legs.
I worry what my friends say to their other friends.
I dreamt that one day, all these scars will be gone.
And i do believe that one day, it WILL be gone.
Just...not anytime soon )':
No comments:
Post a Comment