Im selfish, you're selfish, everyone's selfish

Im not racist. I just feel that everyone should deserve to be treated fairly.

Im not a hypocrite. At least im being nice to ppl. 

No. This is a pretty different post. Im not going to grumble like how i always do. And i realized that i grumble about similiar things. 

I dont want to be misunderstood or get hated in any way. I dont want to be proved wrong or be judged upon cos i cant accept myself being wrong. Im not obsessive though. If im wrong, fine i'll accept it. But i'll turn sour and it wont be such a nice face to show. 

Some of u may rmb, some of you may have not. Its been a few years since the mosque is able to play the 'azan' to signify all the muslims that its time for prayers. 

Before i continue, here's the definition of 'azan':

"Adhan or azan is the Islamic call to prayer"

It is usually played from the mosques in each neighbourhood to inform ppl that it is time for prayers. It is loud, yes i agree. But its bloody not frickin damn disturbing you hear me. 

Some ppl hav complained that the 'azan' is a disturbance. It is too loud, it is noisy and it affects the residents living in blocks. The azan has been going on during prayer timings for many many years. And its already been quite a long time since i heard it being played out loud. 

Long story short: The islamic calls to prayer being played out loud has been stopped.

And i cant do a single thing about it. 

Some guy in macd, i cant even rmb his stupid name just cause he's really that insignificant in my life, and someone of no importance whatsoever commented about the 'azan'. It is evident, so obvious that he is a pea brain and someone who says his own thoughts whatever, whenever, wherever. 

After being restricted from hearing the azan out loud, during the fasting month, its played again to signify that we can all break our fast and eat. Hence, it is played on the radio in macdonalds. So this smartass said that "the islamic prayers are irritating" 

I dont want to be the bitch, ive warned you. If you're sensitive about ure culture pls dont read what im gonna write. 

You said the islamic prayers are irritating. 

Ok. fine. I shant use the word irritating but what about the chinese funeral? Isnt it loud too? Most of them take place under the block and some play music while some use a microphone to be listened to by the attenders of the funeral. What about those chinese concerts that take place under the block all the way till the wee hours? What about the ghost festival? The ghost festival that requires to burn ppr and incense? Did u rlly think it was such a fine matter? We had to inhale all these.

And we did not complain.

Ok maybe maybe all these facts im stating is wrong, maybe all these information im stating here is a misunderstanding. But i've seen this happening. 

I saw those chinese funerals and did not complain. I saw those chinese concerts and i did not complain. 

I had to toughen up and forget about not listening to the islamic prayers being played out loud. 

I had to toughen up and forgive that guy from macd about what he said about my religion. 

And to u guys out there it might not be such a big deal. But i love my religion, i love hearing the islamic prayers and i love my God even much more than you imagine.

So dont come discriminating my religion anymore. I dont frickin deserve any single shit u've said

On the verge

Seriously seriously im really seriously seriously going to give serious attitude soon.

I cant believe this is happening to me. My december wont be as perfect as how i wanted to be since a little troll is following us overseas. Im just wasting my breath convincing my mum for him to not come but like she would listen to this 15 yr old who hasnt faced the real world.

Real world crap this is. Id rather just go back to my own fantasies.

Feelings

What a tough night. It started out so grumpy and then it got rlly busy but no one seems to believe me. 

I believed i hav set the world record for pissing every closed one of mine today. I pissed off my best friend and it rlly sux cos i know what i did wrong and that i was just being a stupid douchebag. And i dont want anything major to happen. The only major thing that i want to get out of this is my lesson learnt of being such a douchebag but its like...its always me getting doing all the stupid mistakes, its always me at fault and i always feel bad for it. Its all genuine, every single shit im feeling right now is so genuine it cant even be compared. I pissed off my lit partner of whom i dont even know if he's rlly pissed off at me or if he's just joking around trying to make me take back my actions of tricking him just now. I pissed off sex bomb cause i didnt reply any of her calls or texts i pissed off my mum cause she didnt pick up her calls and i was being so unreasonable towards her even tho she gave me money to spend. Im such a bloody coward that its understandable that everyone of whom is so close to me right now just hates me a bit. And maybe i should just tell myself to grow the hell up if i still want to have friends. Maybe i should just snap out of this shithole that im in and be the angel that i've always wanted to be. 

Maybe i just cant turn into smtg so nice and dandy anymore cause im such a bitch inside. 

And life waits for no bitch. I just hope my friends would wait for me cause they dont deserve this treatment ive been feeding them. 

End of the week

So this just in:

• Farinna has been ditching us for her arm and im really worried that im gonna flunk math. 

And recently, she picked on me just cause i turned my head to look at louis. She claimed i was not paying attention and that i need to get back right on track. 

I was so appalled i couldnt even speak or form any sentence structure apart from "huh" 

There's nothing i hate more than being accused of not paying attention. 

End of year is coming and for once im feeling the sense of urgency. 

My top girls

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAYSMURFEYSIMINSIMIDAIJI lol ok im being retarded. 

Ive had so many partners this year and it was because of me that told samuel to change my seating plan so that i can seat with simin cause i didnt want to hav a boring partner. And because of my magical decision, me and simin grew rlly close as the days go by and seeing her face 24/7 is so "sickening". But matter how "sickening" it is, having her not be there beside me as a partner just for one day is already enough to kill and make me go crazy. So simin when you're reading this, i rlly appreciate every single thing you've done for me. AND your knocks on my head are....FORGIVEN :)

And not to forget, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MY SWEETIEPIE EUNICE 

Thank you for everything, really. If it werent for you i dont think ive ever found a friend AS understanding. Its been a blast hanging out with you as the months go past and its been rlly fun bunking with you at OBS. Me and ducky are doing well at the moment in case youre asking he he i still havent got your present yet but im getting it ok i swear im getting it! Having heart to heart talks w you has always been really relaxing and confiding stuff in you was never something i was hesitant off. May all the butterflies get away from your path and may you stay as enchanting as ever :) 

May both of you get your prince charming that'll luv you guys like how i luv rice ok?
Luv you both to bits and pieces

Shady

It hurts so much that such a nice dance cant be showcased, cant even be given a chance to show only for a mere 3 minutes.

Ppl tell me to cheer up about it and forget about it cause exams are near but this bull talk is ridiculous. Imagine you, having put in so much effort in your exams get a zero score. It sucks right. Dont tell me you're going to be all fine with it cause you know u put in a lot of effort and that you know u hav studied hard and u will tell urself that everything happens for a damn reason. Ya so when you eat shit, that happens for a reason also right? When you cheat on ure girlfr/boyf that also happens for a reason right? Fate and destiny blame all over again. Stop dodging the bullets and just get real. Dont tell me to cheer up cause if i want to cheer up i'll tell myself to cheer up and i will cheer up. Its like no one out there wants to listen to my 2 cents worth and its getting frustrating cos i feel like im being alienated and i feel like an outcast.

Every single day.

Every single day i fantasize about performing this dance on stage. I knew what i was gonna wear, i knew how my hair was gonna be like and for the first time i had a detailed plan in my life. I was excited, nervous all those feelings of which i felt so much in primary school but had so little when i turned into a teenager. I dont want to live an unevenful life. I dont want to end my supposedly last yr in dance having only at most 4 months next yr to dance whatever i can.

So i guess our 3 minutes worth of dance is too long for assembly.
Ok well so bloody sorry for wasting 3 minutes of the hall's aircorn electricity bill too.

Cute so cute

No link picture no link gif but..............like i care xx